Apr. 10, 2022

Celebrate the small stuff

So, we are just returning from vacation and getting ready to head back to our normal lives.  Now this vacation was designed 100% as a family vacation.  Actually, it was a present for our oldest daughter as we had promised her a spring break trip her senior year.  She picked the destination and we set everything up for all of us.  So, Cancun was the spot and off we went.

Now we did set it up with the kids having their own room so if something fun where to happen, then it could.  But, we quickly discovered this was not going to be the case.  I give myself a solid 7 out of 10 in the looks department.  But looking around at the people at our resort we discovered that I was in the top tier of men there.  All we could think about was that men have giving up on staying in shape.  We have become lazy and our own physical looks don’t seem to be on our minds.  Now I know there are people who do have health conditions and weight can be an issue.  But overall the men there were overweight and seemed to care little about it.

My wife was able to identify one man that caught her eye.  He was a tall, black man with an athletic body.  He was energetic and seemed to always be having fun.  But there was not going to be a chance to even try conversation with him because he was obviously there with his wife and son.  Even with that, it was still nice that my wife was able to see another man as attractive and interesting.  What made it even better was that she shared her thoughts about this man with me.  She was able to dip a toe in the water, even if was just a tiny bit. 

I thought that was a big step for her.  It was also a big step for me.  This really was the first time she pointed out someone as if things were to go well, she could have possibly played around more.  I was excited about this baby step.  We have been slowly moving along in this process and to move just a little bit further was a good thing.  The best part was that it was and will always be on her pace. 

I know that this blog post is short, but I really wanted to stick to my Monday releases.  I just wanted to share a little bit about what happened on our vacation.  That even if you feel like the pace is moving to slow for you, you need to remember a few things.  I am speaking from the male perspective.  The first thing, you are not in control of the pace.  You partner is 100% in control.  The second thing, continued communication is critical.  Know the time and place to talk.  Read her mood, if she isn’t ready, then table it for a bit.  She will let you know when the time is right.  The last thing, celebrate the little things when you do move forward.  Even if it something as small as her saying a guy is hot.  Acknowledge her moving forward.  BUT, don’t take her saying someone is hot as an open ticket to speed things up.  The two of you are in this together.  Enjoy the ride, it may be long and winding, or it may be a short and straight.  In the end, the goal is the same.  For you to both be happy.  Love your partner where they are at.  Love your partner for where they are going.  Love your partner for who they are, because without your partner, you would not be who you are.