This week I had the pleasure to learn more about another couple in the lifestyle. They can be found on Twitter @Poorlittlewhit1, please check them out as they have so much more to share about their journey into the lifestyle.
We’re a married couple in our mid-forties and feel that we are both fairly successful professionals. We live in a state with hateful politicians and lots of guns. (hint, hint) The idea to start this lifestyle was all his and he best describes them as a cuckold/cuckoldress couple. But as with every relationship in this lifestyle, there really isn’t just one way to look at it. If he was to put it on a scale that started with a sissy pussy free locked up cuckold all the way to the stag/vixen dynamic, he would consider them as a cuck/hotwife. As he is still takes the lead in arranging their play times. But she has begun to take over the reins a bit more as they continue to play.
Please tell me your sexual journey leading up to starting the lifestyle. I was brought up in the church, hardcore. We were virgins when we married. Although, we did spend a lot of time necking on our college campus. We weren’t particularly good at sex at first. The church folks said it would be glorious if you saved your virginity….hogwash. All I knew about sex was don’t do it until you are married and whatever I had gleaned from late night Skinemax. Early on, knowing that she had that minx in her, I went a little nuts with trying out different kinks. I brought home some pornos to watch, bought a little riding crop, some comfy cuffs, basically thought if I dig out the right kink I would get that minx in her to come out. Even with exploring all the kinks, we found our best purchase was a Hitachi magic wand. She really didn’t orgasm on the regular till we got that. They should rate those Hitachis in terms of orgasms provided before they bite the dust. So, here I was, getting cucked by a Hitachi magic wand, but I loved watching her orgasm.
Discovering myself wasn’t always easy. I went through a phase where I kind of went nuts on porn and strippers, but I did find my way back to a bit of sanity. That was about a 10-15 years timeframe, mind you. During that time she would occasionally get off with my tongue, Hitachi, or ever so rarely, my cuckold penis.
So, I started listening to the podcast Keys & Anklets and Venus Cuckoldress, and I thought maybe, hearing that other ladies enjoyed the lifestyle, if I shared it with her, she would see that it really did happen in real life. I sent her some of the pods last year, half expected to be shut down but instead she listened to a few She was intrigued, we talked, she listened to a few more, we talked and the process continued in that order. After all the listening and talking we had some hot sex when I told her a detailed fantasy of her being at Splash Mocha sometime in the future.
So we talked about if we really wanted to do it, we had to discuss how it would look if we did it. The more we talked the easier it was for both of us to understand and she finally said she would be willing to try it. But things didn’t just instantly take off, so I let it lay low for about a month or so, we didn’t do anything. I didn’t want to pressure her into doing something she didn’t really want to do even though she had said she wanted to try, so I put the ball in her court and let her take the lead.
Whose ideas was it to start the lifestyle? So looking back at all of this, is was definitely my decision.
What was it like the first time you discussed opening up your relationship? Probably the first time it was like a, huh, huh, I mean, what a funny joke! Opening our relationship?
How long have you been in the lifestyle? Really only about 3 months in all.
How often do you get to play in the lifestyle? A few times a month more or less.
What kinks do you like to play with in the lifestyle? We haven’t done a ton of kink. She helped me pick out panties I wore once and slightly played with chastity.
What rules if any did the two of you make before going into looking for your first partner?
We decided that we would use protection in the form of condoms, there would be no anal, we would have a meet and greet before playing and that the two of us would be there to share the experience.
What was it like when you looked for your first bull or partner? Where did you look? We used a two pronged approach: we used SDC, a lifestyle site, and we had reached out to a well-known Cuckoldress and she recommended a gentleman. We were very lucky in the process as we found what we felt were two king of spades. Meaning two of the best guys we could find in our area.
What process did you go through after finding a partner to join the two of you? We chatted on massaging apps, planned a meet and greet with an option to adjourn to a location and play.
Was there play on the first date? Or was it just a meet and greet thing?
Well…it was supposed to be a meet and greet, I was driving and they were in the backseat on the way to the night l club and they started playing before we actually made it to the night club.
What more can you tell us about your first play date?
Well, there was oral and hand sex going on in the backseat and deep throating. We went to the nightclub, danced a bit and went back to the car. We are discussing what the next step would be. I remember that she smiled, fluttered her eyes, and said, we should go to a hotel. Sex ensued at the hotel and I think some things need to stay private and just for us to remember. But I am sure you can use your imagination as to what went on.
Since your first play date, how many more times have you played?
In our 3 months, we have had the opportunity to play around 7-9 time in all, depending on how you count times we have played?
What is the ideal dynamic for having a bull or bulls in your relationship?
I don’t think we know yet. Most of all, the bull should be not only attractive and gentlemanly, but also somebody we can just vibe with. As all of this is an evolving thing which we are still learning as we go, we will just have to figure out the details of what we both are really looking for.
What has been the best part of the lifestyle? For me, seeing her in the throes of pleasure and for her being able to voice that she wants that pleasure.
What has been the worst part of the lifestyle? We have had a guy flake on us when we were supposed to meet and another that was just weird so I faked a stomach ache to get out of it.
Can you describe Cuck Angst? The tension space between “oh my god. All my dreams are coming true!!!!!yes!!!!” and“ Oh my god. All my dreams (nightmares) are coming true. Help!”
If you could go back to when you first started, knowing what you know now, what advice would you give to yourself and your partner?
Be pickier. Be stricter about what’s acceptable. Be even braver to call our shots. This is our thing and we get to decide everything that will take place.
If you could go back and do it all over again, would you decide not to go into the lifestyle? NO WAY!!!!!
What advice would you give to someone new going into the lifestyle?
We have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Listen to each other, and listen actively. Really listen to your partner, actively listen hear by seeing her body language and her non-verbal cues. She will really cue you in on how she is feeling in each step of the process. Questions work much better than, here is my detailed fantasy. Are you ready to make it happen? Communication is vital in every step of the process.
Deep dives into the cuckold lifestyle with interviews from real cuckold couples.
A sexual journey with Jamie and Julie
Published 2-25-22
In this article, we will meet Jamie and Julie, a married couple who lives in Europe and are living in a cuckold relationship. Jamie is 61 years old and Julie is 54 years old and have been married for 23 years but together 25 years. They have one child together who is already a teenager. Jamie has one child from a previous marriage. Jamie is a stay at home dad and Julie is a manager at a large company.
How would you describe your sexual journey before entering into your cuckolding relationship?
We started by swinging and dealing with too many couples where the other couple’s wife wasn’t on board 100%. Julia was always having a good time so that peaked her interest in continuing in the lifestyle.
Whose idea was it to start the cuckolding relationship?
It was mine, she did originally think it was a way for me to just cheat. She was more than willing to try but was skeptical about my motivation to open the marriage.
What was it like the first time you discussed opening up your relationship?
That conversation was over 15 years ago, so some of the details are forgotten. We had been married just a few years our sex life was great and we had a kinky side, so talking about things was very easy for both of us.
How long have you been in the lifestyle?
Hardcore 3 years dabbling for 17 years total now.
How often do you get to play in the lifestyle?
We are averaging just a little less than once a week.
What kinks do you like to play with in the lifestyle?
Chastity is our thing now. I bought my first cage in 2000, after reading an article about a journalist reviewing the idea. I found it kinky she found it …meh. It wasn’t until she had her first regular boyfriend that she took over caging as her thing.
What rules if any did the two of you make before going into looking for your first partner?
None just have fun. The first two were for her amazing sexual experiences but I freaked out and we wound up taking many years off. Then we moved to Europe and started going to clubs. The swinger clubs were too inconsistent with attractive people so we decided to go online and check things out. So we starting using the websites SLS or SDC to find our bulls and partners.
What process did you go through after finding a partner to join the two of you?
We started with the chat functions from the sites. Once a certain amount of interest was there we exchanged WhatsApp or Telegram. Then it was just a matter of time to decide if they understood the situation and could handle a passive husband being there.
Was there play on the first date? Or was it just a meet and greet kind of thing?
We almost always playe on the first meeting. Our schedule is so busy we don’t have time for dinners and drinks.
What more can you tell us about your first play date?
She actually had a blind date. I had met the guy and she had only texted. She went alone to his hotel and it was in her opinion one of her greatest sexual experiences in her life. Being at home wasn’t easy for me and after 4 hours I used Find My iPhone and her phone wasn’t located anywhere close to the hotel. So I started first by texting then after a few unanswered texts I called. She didn’t believe I freaked out just from the location (gps glitch) but saw it as ugly jealousy. Our second encounter I was there but again I was unstable because I thought the guy was being an asshole to me. But she loved fucking him. He had a huge cock and had amazing stamina. That shit show almost made her divorce me. So we took about 3 years off until going to the clubs again in Europe.
Since your first play date, how many more times have you played?
I keep a detailed journal of chastity orgasms and play dates. Within the past 12 months 44 play dates with 17 different men. Including 2 vacations to Greece and Italy as a throuple.
What is the ideal dynamic for having a bull or bulls in your relationship?
We prefer a bisexual or bi curious man. Due to our two home locations, she is probably going to play alone more often in the coming years, but I would like to do it together as often as possible. That being said we have found an abundance of men for her to play with and this journey has an interesting impact. She has found out how diverse the lifestyle can be. She has one who she loves and adores and another who would be best described as a circus ringmaster. She entered the lifestyle hoping to have fun but found an intense emotional connection with one. We are currently also starting a relationship with a true dominant bull. He will perhaps lead us into new areas of submission and experimentation. We have only committed to trying to see what we like avoiding certain labels and gatekeepers so prevalent in the lifestyle.
What has been the best part of the lifestyle?
Increased trust, passion and communication.
What has been the worst part of the lifestyle?
Arrogant men with limp dicks. Which there seem to be a lot of right now.
Can you describe Cuck Angst?
It’s cuck food :)
If you could go back to when you first started, knowing what you know now, what advice would you give to a younger Jamie and Julie?
Start early and don’t trip on your ego. It’s sex, keep it separate from love ( unless you are poly).
If you could go back and do it all over again, would you decide not to go into the lifestyle?
No! What advice would you give to someone new going into the lifestyle? Trust your partner and do it together as your newly evolving sexual orientation. Empowering your partner to be able to experience sexual freedom. We are both empowered neither one of us compromises what we desire, find that balance and it will be blissful.
You can find even more information by following this great couple on Twitter @jamielocked7