New Blog post added 3/19/2023 Deep Dive

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This week I had the pleasure to learn more about another couple in the lifestyle. They can be found on Twitter @Poorlittlewhit1, please check them out as they have so much more to share about their journey into the lifestyle.

We’re a married couple in our mid-forties and feel that we are both fairly successful professionals. We live in a state with hateful politicians and lots of guns. (hint, hint) The idea to start this lifestyle was all his and he best describes them as a cuckold/cuckoldress couple. But as with every relationship in this lifestyle, there really isn’t just one way to look at it. If he was to put it on a scale that started with a sissy pussy free locked up cuckold all the way to the stag/vixen dynamic, he would consider them as a cuck/hotwife. As he is still takes the lead in arranging their play times. But she has begun to take over the reins a bit more as they continue to play.

Please tell me your sexual journey leading up to starting the lifestyle. I was brought up in the church, hardcore. We were virgins when we married. Although, we did spend a lot of time necking on our college campus. We weren’t particularly good at sex at first. The church folks said it would be glorious if you saved your virginity….hogwash. All I knew about sex was don’t do it until you are married and whatever I had gleaned from late night Skinemax. Early on, knowing that she had that minx in her, I went a little nuts with trying out different kinks. I brought home some pornos to watch, bought a little riding crop, some comfy cuffs, basically thought if I dig out the right kink I would get that minx in her to come out. Even with exploring all the kinks, we found our best purchase was a Hitachi magic wand. She really didn’t orgasm on the regular till we got that. They should rate those Hitachis in terms of orgasms provided before they bite the dust. So, here I was, getting cucked by a Hitachi magic wand, but I loved watching her orgasm.

Discovering myself wasn’t always easy. I went through a phase where I kind of went nuts on porn and strippers, but I did find my way back to a bit of sanity. That was about a 10-15 years timeframe, mind you. During that time she would occasionally get off with my tongue, Hitachi, or ever so rarely, my cuckold penis.

So, I started listening to the podcast Keys & Anklets and Venus Cuckoldress, and I thought maybe, hearing that other ladies enjoyed the lifestyle, if I shared it with her, she would see that it really did happen in real life. I sent her some of the pods last year, half expected to be shut down but instead she listened to a few She was intrigued, we talked, she listened to a few more, we talked and the process continued in that order. After all the listening and talking we had some hot sex when I told her a detailed fantasy of her being at Splash Mocha sometime in the future.

So we talked about if we really wanted to do it, we had to discuss how it would look if we did it. The more we talked the easier it was for both of us to understand and she finally said she would be willing to try it. But things didn’t just instantly take off, so I let it lay low for about a month or so, we didn’t do anything. I didn’t want to pressure her into doing something she didn’t really want to do even though she had said she wanted to try, so I put the ball in her court and let her take the lead.

Whose ideas was it to start the lifestyle? So looking back at all of this, is was definitely my decision.

What was it like the first time you discussed opening up your relationship? Probably the first time it was like a, huh, huh, I mean, what a funny joke! Opening our relationship?

How long have you been in the lifestyle? Really only about 3 months in all.

How often do you get to play in the lifestyle? A few times a month more or less.

What kinks do you like to play with in the lifestyle? We haven’t done a ton of kink. She helped me pick out panties I wore once and slightly played with chastity.

What rules if any did the two of you make before going into looking for your first partner?

We decided that we would use protection in the form of condoms, there would be no anal, we would have a meet and greet before playing and that the two of us would be there to share the experience.

What was it like when you looked for your first bull or partner? Where did you look? We used a two pronged approach: we used SDC, a lifestyle site, and we had reached out to a well-known Cuckoldress and she recommended a gentleman. We were very lucky in the process as we found what we felt were two king of spades. Meaning two of the best guys we could find in our area.

What process did you go through after finding a partner to join the two of you? We chatted on massaging apps, planned a meet and greet with an option to adjourn to a location and play.

Was there play on the first date? Or was it just a meet and greet thing?

Well…it was supposed to be a meet and greet, I was driving and they were in the backseat on the way to the night l club and they started playing before we actually made it to the night club.

What more can you tell us about your first play date?

Well, there was oral and hand sex going on in the backseat and deep throating. We went to the nightclub, danced a bit and went back to the car. We are discussing what the next step would be. I remember that she smiled, fluttered her eyes, and said, we should go to a hotel. Sex ensued at the hotel and I think some things need to stay private and just for us to remember. But I am sure you can use your imagination as to what went on.

Since your first play date, how many more times have you played?

In our 3 months, we have had the opportunity to play around 7-9 time in all, depending on how you count times we have played?

What is the ideal dynamic for having a bull or bulls in your relationship?

I don’t think we know yet. Most of all, the bull should be not only attractive and gentlemanly, but also somebody we can just vibe with. As all of this is an evolving thing which we are still learning as we go, we will just have to figure out the details of what we both are really looking for.

What has been the best part of the lifestyle? For me, seeing her in the throes of pleasure and for her being able to voice that she wants that pleasure.

What has been the worst part of the lifestyle? We have had a guy flake on us when we were supposed to meet and another that was just weird so I faked a stomach ache to get out of it.

Can you describe Cuck Angst? The tension space between “oh my god. All my dreams are coming true!!!!!yes!!!!” and“ Oh my god. All my dreams (nightmares) are coming true. Help!”

If you could go back to when you first started, knowing what you know now, what advice would you give to yourself and your partner?

Be pickier. Be stricter about what’s acceptable. Be even braver to call our shots. This is our thing and we get to decide everything that will take place.

If you could go back and do it all over again, would you decide not to go into the lifestyle? NO WAY!!!!!

What advice would you give to someone new going into the lifestyle?

We have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Listen to each other, and listen actively. Really listen to your partner, actively listen hear by seeing her body language and her non-verbal cues. She will really cue you in on how she is feeling in each step of the process. Questions work much better than, here is my detailed fantasy. Are you ready to make it happen? Communication is vital in every step of the process.